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Below are the 5 most recent journal entries recorded in kankuro_i's LiveJournal:

Wednesday, July 6th, 2005
8:23 pm
pineapples!!!
another frickin day. and i am pissed. at my girl friend. i got this letter titled "for your eyes only" and, after reading it, have surmised that she is quite cruel. i still miss her intently, and i can't wait to hold her again.

that is, when we are on speaking terms.
Monday, July 4th, 2005
3:23 pm
i think i just tried to put a fire out with gasoline
s my sister has a livejournal. cute. sometimes, i wonder if she is gonna be okay. then, she kicks someones ass, smokes a cigarette, or gets into some other kind of trouble, and smiles and talks about how "kewl" i am. then i know that i have created a monster. hey kiddo, since you are reading this, let me say that, mischivious as you are, you will never top me. ever. simple fact of life. good try though.

as far as the army... I AM SURROUNDED BY MORONS!!! here's a thought people : grow the fuck up. get over yourselves. realize that this is not high school. then kill yourselves and make the world that much better of a place. i got reamed because an e-5 hit me. so i decked him. over and over again. i think we have an understanding.

just once, i wish my friggin parents would send a letter more than 2 sentences long. argh.

and my girlfriend. i miss my girlfriend. period. damnit, love is a motherfucker. i miss her friends too. they were/are awesome.
3:18 pm
arghh
rule number one of the military : do not hit back!! i have never done so many push ups in my life. but then i smile, and think of what i did to the other guy. hehehehehe...
Friday, July 1st, 2005
2:14 am
another minute gone by...
and i say "alright. enough bullshit. hey god? where are you?"

"YO."

"alright god. what gives? your holy land is a fucking mess. i mean, NO COFFEE??!!! whaT kind of people are these?"

"MY FIRST ATTEMPT AT MAKING A GROUP OF PEOPLE FANATICALLY LOYAL TO ME."

"oops."

"SUE ME."

"well, were you smoking crack or what?"

"NO. CRACK, HOWEVER, WAS INVOLVED WHEN I CAME UP WITH THE IDEA OF REDNECKS."

"out-fucking-standing. so, the real reason i asked you to come here : why do you hate me so much.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN? WAS IT THE MORTAR THING? DAMN, ALL YOU PEOPLE DO IS BITCH BITCH BITCH..."

"no, i mean, i don't THINK you shot mortars at me. i mean, why did you create beings with the potential to create themselves, and forget to tell them that stupidity is a bad thing?"

"WHAT, SO I HAVE TO THINK FOR YOU NOW? I WILL TELL YOU A SECRET : I ONLY MADE 2 STUPID PEOPLE. THE PROBLEM IS, THEY STARTED BREEDING. WORSE THAN ROACHES, LET ME TELL YOU. EVERY TIME I SQUASH ONE, I FIND 5 MORE UNDER THE SINK. I COULDN'T EVEN GET THEM TO KILL EACH OTHER. I MEAN, THEY HATE EACH OTHER, AND THEN SHOOT EXPLOSIVES AT CREATIONS MORE INTELLIGENT THAN THEM. LIKE CONCRETE BARRIERS. THE WORST PART? MY MORE GENIUS CREATIONS, LIKE YOURSELF, GET STUCK IN THE CONFLICT, PERFECTLY CAPABLE OF BREAKING NECKS, BUT TOO UNMOTIVATED TO MUCH MORE THAN LIGHT CIGARETTES AND SMART OFF."

"so now I have to shoot at your screw ups. thanks a lot, god."

"SMART-ASS."

"gaywad"

"SO WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO ABOUT IT?"

"i dunno. tell them that being retarded is a sin against allah or something."

"I DID!! I SAID SO IN THE KORAN AND IN THE BIBLE!!"

"well, obviously, you didn't make it fucking clear enough. what ever happened to 'thou shalt not blow up schools?"

"MUST'VE LEFT THAT OUT."

"well, fix it."

"I'LL GET RIGHT ON IT."

"your welcome. man, what would you do without me?"
2:01 am
finally
so here i am, in iraq. i was mortared twice today, each shell landing about 300 ft from where i was standing, which was next to 130 octane aviation fuel, about 1500 gallons of it. i looked to my buddy.
"hey phelan, can i bum a lite?"
"sure. hey, maybe we shouldn't smoke here."
"nah. that fire hazard sign is all for show."
*BOOM* *BOOM*
"alright. jesus christ dude. maybe we should go to a bunker or something."
"fuck that. i say we try to catch the next round. just like a football, my man..."
*sound of sgt yelling* "HEY RETARDS! GET TO FUCKING COVER!!!"
"hey phelan."
"yeah oestreich?"
"he is WAY to high strung."
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